Unthinkable
02-12-03, 03:36 PM
The doctor has just finished giving the young man a thorough physical examination.
"The best thing for you to do," the M.D. said, "is give up drinking and smoking, get to bed early and stay away from women."
"Doc, I don't deserve the best," said the patient. "What's next best?"
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Suspecting her husband of infidelity, the woman attempted to put an end to it by arousing his jealousy. "What would you say if I told you that I've been sleeping with your best friend?" she asked provocatively.
"Well," he mused, "I'd say that you're a Lesbian."
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Mrs. Culpepper was almost in tears. "Oh, Marie," she said to her maid, "I believe my husband is having an affair with his secretary." "I don't believe it," snapped Marie. "You're just saying that to make me jealous."
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Proud and pleased as she could be, the petite young bride, Mrs. Stanford Summers, strode briskly up to the teller's cage at the bank to cash her husband's pay check for the first time. When the teller told her the check would have to be endorsed, the bride grabbed the pen and unhesitatingly wrote on the back, "I heartily recommend my husband, Mr. Stanford Summers."
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The newlyweds entered the elevator of their Miami Beach hotel. The operator, a magnificent blonde, looked at them in surprise and said, "Why, hello, Teddy, how are you?" A frosty silence prevailed until the couple reached their room, when the piqued bride demanded: "Who was that woman?!" "Take it easy, honey," said the groom, "I'm going to have trouble enough explaining you to her."
"The best thing for you to do," the M.D. said, "is give up drinking and smoking, get to bed early and stay away from women."
"Doc, I don't deserve the best," said the patient. "What's next best?"
============================
Suspecting her husband of infidelity, the woman attempted to put an end to it by arousing his jealousy. "What would you say if I told you that I've been sleeping with your best friend?" she asked provocatively.
"Well," he mused, "I'd say that you're a Lesbian."
============================
Mrs. Culpepper was almost in tears. "Oh, Marie," she said to her maid, "I believe my husband is having an affair with his secretary." "I don't believe it," snapped Marie. "You're just saying that to make me jealous."
============================
Proud and pleased as she could be, the petite young bride, Mrs. Stanford Summers, strode briskly up to the teller's cage at the bank to cash her husband's pay check for the first time. When the teller told her the check would have to be endorsed, the bride grabbed the pen and unhesitatingly wrote on the back, "I heartily recommend my husband, Mr. Stanford Summers."
============================
The newlyweds entered the elevator of their Miami Beach hotel. The operator, a magnificent blonde, looked at them in surprise and said, "Why, hello, Teddy, how are you?" A frosty silence prevailed until the couple reached their room, when the piqued bride demanded: "Who was that woman?!" "Take it easy, honey," said the groom, "I'm going to have trouble enough explaining you to her."