zman977
08-11-04, 11:09 AM
Politically correct
> (new 2004 version)
>
> 1. She is not a BABE or a CHICK - She is a BREASTED AMERICAN.
> 2. She is not a SCREAMER or MOANER - She is VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE.
> 3. She is not EASY - She is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.
> 4. She is not DUMB - She is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.
> 5. She has not BEEN AROUND - She is a PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION.
> 6. She is not an AIRHEAD - She is REALITY IMPAIRED.
> 7. She does not get DRUNK or TIPSY - She gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED.
> 8. She does not have BREAST IMPLANTS - She is MEDICALLY ENHANCED.
> 9. She does not NAG YOU - She becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE.
> 10. She is not a SLUT - She is SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED.
> 11. She does not have MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS - She is PECTORALLY SUPERIOR.
> 12. She is not a TWO-BIT WHORE - She is a LOW COST PROVIDER.
>
> HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:
>
> 1. He does not have a BEER GUT - He has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE
> FACILITY.
> 2. He is not a BAD DANCER - He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN.
> 3. He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME - He INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE
> DESTINATIONS.
> 4. He is not BALDING - He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION.
> 5. He is not a CRADLE ROBBER - He prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL
> RELATIONSHIPS
> 6. He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK -He becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL.
> 7. He does not act like a TOTAL ASS - He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL
> INVERSION.
> 8. He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG - He has SWINE EMPATHY.
> 9. He is not afraid of COMMITMENT - He is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED
> 10. He is not HORNY - He is SEXUALLY FOCUSED.
> 11. It's not his crack you see hanging out of his pants....It is MALE
> CLEAVAGE.
> (new 2004 version)
>
> 1. She is not a BABE or a CHICK - She is a BREASTED AMERICAN.
> 2. She is not a SCREAMER or MOANER - She is VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE.
> 3. She is not EASY - She is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.
> 4. She is not DUMB - She is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.
> 5. She has not BEEN AROUND - She is a PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION.
> 6. She is not an AIRHEAD - She is REALITY IMPAIRED.
> 7. She does not get DRUNK or TIPSY - She gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED.
> 8. She does not have BREAST IMPLANTS - She is MEDICALLY ENHANCED.
> 9. She does not NAG YOU - She becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE.
> 10. She is not a SLUT - She is SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED.
> 11. She does not have MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS - She is PECTORALLY SUPERIOR.
> 12. She is not a TWO-BIT WHORE - She is a LOW COST PROVIDER.
>
> HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:
>
> 1. He does not have a BEER GUT - He has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE
> FACILITY.
> 2. He is not a BAD DANCER - He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN.
> 3. He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME - He INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE
> DESTINATIONS.
> 4. He is not BALDING - He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION.
> 5. He is not a CRADLE ROBBER - He prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL
> RELATIONSHIPS
> 6. He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK -He becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL.
> 7. He does not act like a TOTAL ASS - He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL
> INVERSION.
> 8. He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG - He has SWINE EMPATHY.
> 9. He is not afraid of COMMITMENT - He is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED
> 10. He is not HORNY - He is SEXUALLY FOCUSED.
> 11. It's not his crack you see hanging out of his pants....It is MALE
> CLEAVAGE.