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Everything's Broken

Discussion in 'DIRECTV General Discussion' started by Carl Spock, Oct 31, 2007.

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  1. Carl Spock

    Carl Spock Superfly

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    After reading one too many "my stuff doesn't work" posts, I have to get this rant of my chest:


    Every single machine you own, whether it be something simple like a screwdriver or something complicated like a satellite receiver, will break. Every last one. The most natural thing to happen to machines is to break down and rust. Entropy is real. Energy runs out of them. Only by putting more energy into them can we keep them running. Sometimes this takes the form of an oil change in a car. Other times it is a service call by a satellite technician. Knives need sharpening. Drains need flushing. Only by doing these things can we keep our machinery running.

    If you left your car in the garage for a couple of years, would you expect it to start and drive? Not without recharging the battery and possibly putting air into the tires. Even just sitting there, machines break. It's what happens to them.

    Seldom do we think of just the right thing to say in an awkward situation. One time I did was when I was writing up the sale on some piece of electronics in my stereo store. By this point the customer and I were joking around and he said, "Well, will this new piece break?" I put down my pen and looked him in the eye. I replied, yes, it will break. Absolutely it will break. I just can't tell you when. He got it immediately.

    Machines break. It's what they do the best. Working properly is an unnatural state for a machine. It wants to break. It's natural for it to fail. It is going against the flow of the entire universe for a machine to stay working. Every day when you turn on your television system and it works, it is defying our understanding of nature going back to Newton. Instead of getting mad when your machinery stops working, be grateful your machine held off the decay that is inherent in the galaxy for as long as it did.

    The natural state of a machine is broken.


    End of rant.
     
  2. ShmoeTheHo

    ShmoeTheHo Cool Member

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    Oct 14, 2007
    Amen.
     
  3. Greg Alsobrook

    Greg Alsobrook Lifetime Achiever

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    :lol: ... nice post
     
  4. jtn

    jtn Banned User

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    Oct 18, 2007
    Accurate information, I wouldn't say it's a rant, but a fact of life.
     
  5. mchaney

    mchaney Godfather

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    That's deep. :) Still, when my TV breaks 3 days after I bought it, I tend to blame the manufacturer... not the universe. ;)

    Mike
     
  6. netconcepts

    netconcepts Legend

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    Jan 20, 2007
    Sounds like another topic for a Douglas Adams five part trilogy. :D
     
  7. Wisegoat

    Wisegoat Icon

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    Aug 16, 2006
    Definitely not a rant, but the truth!

    Great commentary that can be applied to just about everything in life.
     
  8. Stuart Sweet

    Stuart Sweet The Shadow Knows!

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    Great post. I would further add, when you think about it, it is mindboggling to think that computers actually function at all. Something so small and fast should have a much higher failure rate.

    Mrs. Shadow was frustrated when my dear lamented Sony remote failed after 8 years. She spent a lot of money for that and it was a great gift. It never occurred to her that an IR emitter is really a fancy light bulb, and light bulbs blow.
     
  9. Upstream

    Upstream Hall Of Fame

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    LOL
     
  10. wingrider01

    wingrider01 Hall Of Fame

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    Have been in the technology end of the business for over 37 years, over this teim period I have come to the realization that things break, be they 1 day old to 10 years old, it happens.

    I am sure most everyone is familiar with Murphy's Law

    "what ever can go wrong will go wrong at the worst possible time"

    while this fits the technology field very well, I believe the lesser known O'Toole's law fits it better -

    "Murphy was a optimist"
     
  11. Carl Spock

    Carl Spock Superfly

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    Who would you call in the universe for warranty repair?

    Thanks for your positive remarks, folks. :)
     
  12. hasan

    hasan Well-Known Member

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    "If you left your car in the garage for a couple of years, would you expect it to start and drive? Not without recharging the battery and possibly putting air into the tires. Even just sitting there, machines break. It's what happens to them."

    Not to mention the brakes are going to be in really bad shape. Letting a car sit is one of the worst things you can do to it.

    I would say the natural state is not "broken", but operating in "pre-failure mode". :)

    Saying broken is the natural state, makes is sound like the amount of time something is in a failure mode exceeds the time when it is working properly. and that certainly has not been my experience. (I'm not saying you said this, I'm saying it "sounds" a bit like that to me.) It's a nice catchy phrase, but may be misleading.
     
  13. Carl Spock

    Carl Spock Superfly

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    hasan, you raise an excellent point. Most of our experience is that machines work. But it's just a matter of scale. Let me tell you my favorite joke:

    I live in an area where people grow apples. One fall day I was driving through the orchards when I turned a corner to see a farmer under a tree with some pigs. He picked up one of the pigs and held it below an apple. The farmer strained under the weight of the pig as it ate the apple. When the pig finished, the farmer put it down and picked up another, shakily holding that pig over his head while it ate another apple.

    Being the polite guy I am, I didn't want to walk up to the farmer and say are you completely nuts? Instead, I politely inquired, "Excuse me, but,,,,uhh,,,,doesn't that take you a long time to feed your pigs that way?"

    The farmer looked at me and said, "What's time to a pig?"
     
  14. hasan

    hasan Well-Known Member

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    That is priceless!
     
  15. wingrider01

    wingrider01 Hall Of Fame

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    http://www.universeappl.com/

    /grin:D
     
  16. Carl Spock

    Carl Spock Superfly

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    LOL. :lol:

    My stereo store was called Sound World. One day I noticed half the sign was out. When I called the sign company for repair, I told them I wanted them to fix the World.
     
  17. Skins Fan

    Skins Fan Legend

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    Sep 18, 2007
    I guess I have to throw a BUT! in here

    My 20 yr old VSHR refuses to stop --- and allow me to clear my rack of it.

    My 43 yr old Zenith TV refuses to stop ---and allow me to take it to the antique shop to see how much it is worth.

    My 30 yr old Lenear garage door openers refuse to stop --- allowing me to get new ones that can be programed into new cars.

    I could go on but it scares me. Now, these will all break at the same time!! LOL
     
  18. Skins Fan

    Skins Fan Legend

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    Sep 18, 2007
    I should mention however, the Skins new 2007 team has broken already!:grin:
     
  19. Greg Alsobrook

    Greg Alsobrook Lifetime Achiever

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    where was your store located?
     
  20. Carl Spock

    Carl Spock Superfly

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    ^ There are Sound Worlds all over the country, most of them unrelated. Mine was in La Crosse, Wisconsin.
     
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