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How hard was it to leave home?

Discussion in 'The OT' started by Danny R, May 4, 2005.

Were you homesick upon leaving your childhood home?

  1. Yes - I was homesick. I had a good home.

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  2. Yes - I was homesick. My home wasn't the best.

    17.1%
  3. No - I wasn't homesick. I had a good home.

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  4. No - I wasn't homesick. My home wasn't the best.

    74.3%
  5. I still live at my childhood home.

    8.6%
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  1. May 4, 2005 #1 of 21
    Danny R

    Danny R Goblin the Pug DBSTalk Gold Club

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    Just a quick poll. Had a discussion with some friends about when they left home for the first time and if they were homesick. Also wondering how one's "home" situation played a part.

    My wife had an incredibly hard time adjusting to living on her own, and was very homesick. As a result, she either came home or had her family or I come up every weekend for the first couple of months.

    She's the youngest of two children who were only a grade apart, and her brother still lived at home when she left. Whats more, her parents announced they were getting divorced once she left, adding more of a burden to her move. She had an ok childhood (neither incredibly happy or sad)

    I on the other hand had absolutely no homesickness at all, and enjoyed the freedom. I'm the third of two kids, being 7/9 years younger than my older siblings and 5 years older than my younger brother. I was away the entire summer before my junior year and had no problems leaving for college after HS. I don't think I returned home till Thanksgiving. My parents are still together, and I have no problems with either and had a happy childhood.
     
  2. May 4, 2005 #2 of 21
    lifterguy

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    I first left home when I went to college. I would not say I was "homesick" my first year in college, but I did miss my family, and looked forward to going home for the holidays. As I became more accustomed to living in my college town, I reached an interesting point where I sort of missed being home when I was at college, but I missed being at college when I was home for summer and holidays. I then moved home for a couple of years after college, and by the time I bought my own house and moved out for good, I was definately ready to go. At that point I savored being out on my own, in my very own place, and did not miss being "home" at all. (I am the 3rd of 4 children.)
     
  3. May 4, 2005 #3 of 21
    Redster

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    I come from a military family and 9 months before I graduated, I joined the Navy with a delayed entry program. 1 week out of highschool and I was in Florida boot camp. Wouldnt say that I got homesick,, sure I missed the rest of the family but it was something new and I was ready to go. Our home was great,, I am the middle of 7 kids and even though money was tight,, mom stayed home , dad worked long hours but made up for it on the weekends. Besides,, I had miles of woods , creeks and fields to explore in Maine. Perfect place to grow up IMHO
     
  4. May 4, 2005 #4 of 21
    n8dagr8

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    I had no problem moving at all. I think my folks did a good job of raising me (I like to think so :grin: ). They are still together (seems to be one of the variables we are testing).

    My mother did a very good job of teaching my bro. and I to be independent. I guess that what they call indentured servants now a days :lol: . She made sure we knew how to take care of ourselves at an early age (wash clothes, dishes, vacuum, some cooking...there really isn't anything I can't do around the house)

    I flew for the first time at like 8 weeks (and a lot since then). I stayed with my grandparents for a week here and there and would fly with just my brother. So I guess we got taught to be independent early on. I spend a semester in Europe when I was 21 (had birthday over there) - good thing my scholarship covered that. I have lived in a 2 different states over the past 8 yrs. I guess it all comes down to how I was raised or that I'm 2 of 2 and we are usually more indenpendent.
     
  5. May 4, 2005 #5 of 21
    BobMurdoch

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    I had no problem moving. I could always go home again as they lived a mile away. Six years later I moved from my starter house to my current house in 1996. The SAME month my parents sold the house I grew up in and downsized. THAT hit me hard as I couldn't go back there anymore.
     
  6. May 4, 2005 #6 of 21
    ntexasdude

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    I ran away when I was 15 to escape the cigarette burn torture and beatings.

    Just kiddin'


    I grew up in a loving home but very modest home with 2 older sisters. We lived in a modest house, drove modest cars and had to scrimp from time to time but we always had a homecooked meal on the table. Dad was a fix-it man. He could (and still can) literally take apart anything and fix-it. He usually did it because we couldn't afford expensive repair bills. For this I am truly grateful. He taught me to rebuild a V8 engine out of my sister's 1965 Mustang when I was 13. I became a tinkerer and eventually an engineer. Even in our modest lifestyle Dad was a techno early adopter. The first time I ever saw a microwave oven was in our kitchen, 1970 something. We had one of the first color TV's I ever saw. We had cable TV back in 1979 or so and we had one the first VCR's I ever saw. Mom and Dad had their 50th anniversary last year. Both sisters have been married over 20 years and myself 18. A rarity these days it seems.

    My childhood home was destroyed by a tornado when I was in 10th grade along with lots of memories. Leaving out for college when I was 18 wasn't too difficult. My sisters were already gone and my dog died in the tornado. :(
    I bought a house a mile from my folks house. I talk to my parents all the time via email, telephone and personal visits - my sisters do too. My wife and my mother are good friends and talk all the time. My kids simply adore both sets of grandparents.
     
  7. May 4, 2005 #7 of 21
    cdru

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    The summer after my junior year in high school, I worked in the summer as a lifeguard/facility worker at my denomination's church camp. It was just a summer job, but it also provided housing facilities so it got me out of the house for the summer. It also introduced me to my future wife. My future wife and I returned for the following summer after my senior year in high school as well.

    At that point, the living-on-my-own bug had bitten me and I decided to attend Western Michigan University which just happened to be in the same town where my girlfriend lived with her parents. She was a year behind me in school. I stayed in the dorms and at in the cafeteria, but I was still more or less living on my own, although student loans paid for all the major expenses that first year.

    We ended up returning to the camp for one last summer after my freshman year of college. Out of state tuition proved to be too much so I moved back to Indiana and attended a regional branch of Indiana and Purdue University. I drug my girlfriend back with me and we cohabitated with a high school buddy and his girlfriend in a two bedroom apartment. Yeah..the guys and girls had their own bedroom. :sure:

    This was my first TRUE experience living on my own as I had monthly rent and had to pay for everything on a monthly basis. I was forced to go get a job at blockbuster then an internship at my current employer. My girlfriend and I moved out about 6 months later to our own apartment and the rest is history.

    During the summers working at the camp, I might have visted home once or twice. My family visted several times as well as my dad was a director of a week camp, so I wasn't homesick or anything. It was only a little over an hour away anyways so if I was, I could have easily gone home. During college, I was home about once a month. Mainly to purchase pop so that I could return the empties in Michigan for $.10 a can. Take that money back to Indiana to purchase more on sale. Rinse. Repeat. :)

    When I came back home and lived with my girlfriend, it was just across town. Subsequent apartments actually became closer and closer to my parents. Eventually we started a family and purchased a house less then a mile away from my parents. It wasn't because I was homesick. I knew the area very well as that was where I grew up. The proximity to my parents was actually more of a convienence as we had a free babysitter.

    My older sister did much the same thing as I did, initially moving across town but then moving back closer to home. She actually purchased the same house that my parents owned before they moved into their current home.

    So basically I wouldn't say it was hard moving out. It was probably the best thing I ever did for my own personal growth. Looking back, I kick myself for moving out early instead of leeching I mean living off my parents when I was in college. I wonder about how much money I would have now if I didn't have to make a 800 in rent/utilities montly for all those months. Since moving out, I have actually grown closer to my parents and sister. Before that, I think I may have said 10 words to my sister in 18 years..or so it seems. Now just this last weekend I spent a half hour after mowing her lawn debating the philosophical aspects of the Amazing Race and Survivor...mainly how much an ass Rob is.
     
  8. May 4, 2005 #8 of 21
    Nick

    Nick Retired, part-time PITA DBSTalk Club

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    I never did officially leave home. I was out hitchhiking one day and caught a ride with a 30-something redhead and her three daughters who were heading to Florida, so I just went along. I was 14 at the time, and it never occurred to me to go back home. We almost never made it to Florida either. :p
     
  9. May 4, 2005 #9 of 21
    RichW

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    After graduating high school I went off to a special summer camp all expenses paid.

    They taught me how to hunt. We had great fun hiking every day and learning how to pitch a tent and drive or ride in special off-road vehicles. It sure was a lot of fun! Then some of us got to go to an advanced camp where we learned how to hunt with very sophisticated rifles and other firearms. We also learned other valuable skills like how to get up very early in the morning, how to polish our shoes, and strengthen our bodies with lots of push-ups. The camp conselors were really great and enthusiastic. They spoke very loud so we all could hear them. We even got special clothes to wear.

    But the best was yet to come. Most of us did so well that they gave us an all-expense paid trip to a very warm place across the Pacific Ocean. Lots of good oriental food to eat over there. I was so happy, I could have died and gone to heaven right there and then. In fact, some of my camp buddies did.
     
  10. ntexasdude

    ntexasdude Hall Of Fame

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    :lol: :lol:

    I went to a very similar camp except about 2 decades later in 1986. I never really heard camp expressed that way. :D
     
  11. Redster

    Redster Godfather/Supporter DBSTalk Gold Club

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    :lol:
     
  12. djlong

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    I wonder how many people had a situation like mine.

    My adoptive mother moved out of the house before I did!
     
  13. SimpleSimon

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    Wow. Dang, DJ - we've GOTTA meet sometime!

    My biological mother moved out before me. I was 9. Didn't see much of her for a couple of decades after that.

    Went off to college in '72, came back in '73, married in '74, moved out of my Dad's place in '76 or thereabouts. He picked a fight with me to make it happen. ;) Told me what he'd done a week after my wife & I were in our own apartment. :) I'd been staying there to help him with the bills, but, as almost always was the case, he was right.

    Moved to Colorado in '80 among all the "why would you want to do that?" from all the people that had never been here - including my Dad. He came out to visit that first summer, and I took him to Rocky Mt. Nat'l Park. He stood there motionless and silent looking at Longs Peak for around 20 minutes, and then turned to me and said:
    Of course, he came to visit at least once a year thereafter, and eventually moved in with me for a bit, but needed to move back east as he had no friends out here. He loved Pikes Peak, tho. So, I spread his ashes up there, and can see the spot every day. :)

    When I got divorced, all our friends back east kept saying to my ex and I "Well, guess you'll be moving back home, huh?". Independently, we each told them 'Hell, NO! I AM home!". :)
     
  14. djlong

    djlong Hall Of Fame

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    Funny you should say that - my adoptive mother moved out, from NH to ME and then from ME to CO (Colorado Springs). I visited her once out there. Had a view of Pike's Peak out her bedroom window.

    Talk about breathtaking!
     
  15. ntexasdude

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    Not to get too far off the subject, but............. Colorado IS one of the most spectacular places in the US. I've been going there to snow ski and trout fish since I was in second grade. I remember going there in the summer of 1972 between 2nd and 3rd grade for vacation to a place called Fun Valley. Dad drove us in a 1969 Chevy station wagon and we pulled a little utility trailer with our tent and camping gear. I remember driving to the top of Pikes Peak and then my dad going around and helping all of the flatland tourists (like us) adjust the choke plates on their carbureators so the car would start at 14,000 feet. My wife and kids have "camped" for 5 or 6 summers in a row now in Mom and Dad's gigantic motorhome. I was finally able to go with them last summer for 10 days. We got to see the headwaters of the Rio Grande and it was breathtaking.

    I have travelled all over this great country, North, South, East and West and Colorado is special. The Redwood forests in Calif. come in a close second. :)

    Simon, if I had a life and job there I'd never move either. :D
     
  16. RichW

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    Colorado is OK if you like skinny trees. :)
     
  17. Phil T

    Phil T Well-Known Member DBSTalk Club

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    I moved to Colorado in 1977 at age 25. I didn't know anyone who lived here, just came out with a 75 Jeep CJ5 and a u-haul. I gave myself 3 weeks to find a job or go back to Ohio. I got a job after 2 weeks, got an apartment, got married, had twins and am still here 28 years later!! :)
     
  18. lee635

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    Wow I was 12 in 1977. :)

    We lived in a big house that someone else built but then went bankrupt and had to sell. My next older sibling was 5 years older, so I was the only one in the house in high school, until my oldest brother moved home, but he was about 20 years older than me and was more like an uncle than a brother, and he moved into a seperate house on the same property. Anyway, I had three rooms and a bathroom to myself that was distanced from my parents by another 3 rooms that were my sister's suite, in case she ever wanted to move back. We lived in a rural area about an hour south of New Orleans, which if you look on a map you will know that we had to have lived on that finger that sticks out into the gulf of mexico. Anyway, my high school was about a 45 minute drive from home, so I ususally would hang with friends in town, since I was about the only person who commuted that far to school. I'd eat a friend's house, or just get something on the way home. I was on the bowling team and mostly bowled every night and got home at 8 or 9 or 10, so did a lot on your own stuff as a teen. Also, we had some rental property that I had to work on and that meant some traveling. I never got into trouble so the parents let me do what I wanted mostly.

    As a result, moving away to university, then to Washington, DC wasn't a big deal. I enjoy coming back for holidays and stuff, but never really felt the pull to move back home.
     
  19. RichW

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    But they have them skinny trees in Eastern Oregon too! :)
     
  20. invaliduser88

    invaliduser88 Welcome to Torchwood DBSTalk Gold Club

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    I had the unfortunate experience of having the stereo type SOB whore chasing loser for a Father. Got my rear to college with a good idea of what I never ever want to be...and I haven't...
     
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