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Things customers say


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39 replies to this topic

#21 OFFLINE   Brubear

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Posted 09 July 2012 - 06:26 PM

"Arrow down, highlight and select 'Parental, Favs and Setup'..."

"Why? We ain't got no kids!"

o.O

my comments and opinions are my own and do not suggest endorsement by my employer


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#22 OFFLINE   vthokies1996

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Posted 09 July 2012 - 06:31 PM

A few good IT stories.

I had to spend 30 minutes on the phone giving a lady (who had no business using a computer) the steps for mapping a network drive. Finally get that done and the only thing left was for her to drag a file from Windows explorer to her desktop. I tell her drag the file called ..... to your desktop. There was about 10 seconds of silence then she responds "I don't understand, how do I get the file from my computer screen onto my desk??" After spending 2 minutes trying to explain what a "desktop" is, I eventually had her find someone else and put them on the phone to get the file onto her desktop.

2. I get called to a bigshot's office. His secretary said "None of his computers were working." I walk into the office he says, "I have no idea what the problem is." I walk over and turn on his computers and say "You're computers are not turned on." He says "Well, I didn't turn them off."

3. Get called to a user's desk, he says my monitor is not working. He says, "Trust me, I'm not one of those idiots that calls you to their desk and their monitor isn't even turned on." I told him I would take a look at it. He walks over to a co-workers desk to chat, and I sit down at his computer. Turns out his computer wasn't turned on. I "fix the issue" and walk over to him and say "It's all fixed." He says "Great, what was the problem." I said "Do you really want to know??" He says "Yes". I told him, "Well, your monitor wasn't turned on." As I'm leaving the office, all I can hear is his co-worker belittling him about how he had to call someone to his desk to turn on his monitor.

#23 OFFLINE   Carl Spock

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Posted 10 July 2012 - 03:30 AM

I had a buddy who worked in the audio department of the Montgomery Wards store in San Francisco closest to the Haight in the 1960s. Stoned hippies could be a challenge. One guy returned a television because it always lost the picture and the screen turned snowy in the middle of the night. My friend wanted to ask if this was preceeded by a broadcast of the Star Spangled Banner but didn't. He just took the return.
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#24 OFFLINE   wingrider01

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Posted 10 July 2012 - 05:03 AM

Those of us in the IT world get these kinds of responses all the time. Check out http://www.infoworld...blogs/anonymous for some humorous stories from the field. These stories make me wonder why I am still in IT sometimes (that and not being able to find a job right now).


Of all the years in IT, this still ranks to be my favorite, I still go back to it for a bitof a chuckle.. *warning* adult language *warning*

http://bofh.ch/

the B*****D Operator from H**L

#25 OFFLINE   n3vino

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Posted 10 July 2012 - 06:21 AM

A few good IT stories.

I had to spend 30 minutes on the phone giving a lady (who had no business using a computer) the steps for mapping a network drive.

Imagine how long it would have taken if you were from India. I've talked to support from India and the hardest part is understanding what they are saying. They put you through steps that takes forever to complete. That doesn't fix the problem and then you have to do the same thing again with another CSR.

I had a problem with a computer that was still under warranty. It kept shutting down by itself. I had an in home service call to replace a power supply. That didn't work. He checked everything and couldn't figure it out. Even reloaded the system more than once. I then sent it to their repair facility. I had it back a week later, and it did the same. I sent it back, it came back a week later and it did the same thing. All in all it had the power supply replaced twice, and the mother board replaced once. Nothing worked, so after being patient and dealing with a defective computer for several weeks, they replaced the computer with a new one.

I sent the old one back, but I kept the keyboard, mouse, and monitor. The new one came with a wireless keyboard and mouse. The keyboard sometimes missed strokes. A few months later, I decided to plug in the keyboard from the system they replaced. Guess what. My computer shutdown.

My computer is working just fine with the remote mouse and keyboard.

Edited by n3vino, 10 July 2012 - 06:49 AM.

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#26 OFFLINE   unixguru

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Posted 10 July 2012 - 08:15 AM

Ok I will fess up to the following "homer" moment I had the other day "D'oh"
"Please enter the first letter of the following word "Plasma" "
I read it as the word following the word plasma. there was no word following plasma
the letter was P..:sure::sure:


A bit of a tangent here... sometimes software developers are responsible for misunderstandings and subsequent customer service involvement. If they understood how many dollars one less than clear phrase costs their company they would try harder.

This is a great example. Far clearer to have programmed

Please enter the first letter of the word "Plasma"

#27 OFFLINE   dielray

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Posted 10 July 2012 - 08:38 AM

CSR: Thank you for calling Anycompany Satellite how can I help you?
customer: Yeah I'm trying to watch the pilot rerun of The Walking Dead and it's in black and white, I pay ya'll for color and Hd. What the hells going on down there?
CSR: Hmmm.... It seems that AMC, the broadcaster, is broadcasting that episode in black and white intentionally sir.
customer: Well, why? I pay for color tv.
CSR: I understand sir, I believe it is a homage to the old George Romero zombie movies.
customer: Well I don't give a damn about George Romero or AMC. I make my check out to you...now what are you gonna do to fix it? I also will need some credit since it ain't in color, I pay for color TV.


Very similar to a situation I occasionally run into on a service call. After I get done fixing what ever the issue was the customer naturally starts to check to make sure things are working right. It is at this time they notice the letter boxing they never noticed. One of the most difficult things to explain to a customer with a standard receiver and a tube TV is that in fact the black bars were there prior to my arrival, that I did not do anything to cause them, and that I can't do anything to fix them.
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#28 ONLINE   randyk47

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Posted 10 July 2012 - 08:43 AM

Not exactly a wacky customer story but I actually was turned into the police because of my DirecTV dish. :grin: I was an early adopter of DirecTV in 1999 in a new housing development in Northern Virginia. The cable system sucked pond water so I went to Best Buy and they had an installer out the very next day. The dish wasn't up 24 hours and there was a knock at my front door. It was the lady next door in almost a hysterical fit about me poisoning her children with my "microwave dish". I tried to explain but she was having no part of it. About two hours later a sheriff deputy shows up asking what the dish was for. He actually asked me not to use it until they got it sorted out but I showed him the set up and what it did. He went back to his patrol car for about 30 minutes, then next door, and finally back to me with a "sorry we bothered you". Never heard another thing about it but the woman next door basically didn't speak to us for most of the three years we lived there. :)
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#29 OFFLINE   harsh

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Posted 10 July 2012 - 09:13 AM

Apparently the customer grossly misunderstood the concept of a DVR's ability to "time-shift" programs to the point of unimaginable stupidity.

There was a time when getting satellite (BUD) meant that you could see 90210 a few days before it aired.

Too often we enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought. -- JFK


#30 OFFLINE   studechip

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Posted 10 July 2012 - 09:21 AM

There was a time when getting satellite (BUD) meant that you could see 90210 a few days before it aired.


I used to watch NYPDBlue on Mondays at 1PM instead of Tuesdays at 10PM.

#31 OFFLINE   BAHitman

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Posted 10 July 2012 - 11:09 AM

I used to watch NYPDBlue on Mondays at 1PM instead of Tuesdays at 10PM.


ahhh the good 'ole days...

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#32 OFFLINE   billsharpe

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Posted 10 July 2012 - 11:33 AM

It would have been better to do that to a 3 1/2" floppy, since so many people back then thought those were hard disks.


There weren't any 3 1/2" floppies when I was cutting open 5 1/4" floppy disk covers. Computer lab had IBM PC's with two 5 1/4" floppy disk drives.

Besides, it's much, much easier to extract the bigger disk from its envelope than the smaller disk from its hard enclosure.
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#33 ONLINE   HoTat2

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Posted 10 July 2012 - 11:34 AM

There was a time when getting satellite (BUD) meant that you could see 90210 a few days before it aired.


But to view a scheduled live event that hasn't even occurred yet in space and time? :rolleyes:

I think even the technician commented then that if he had such a miraculous device he certainly wouldn't be a working stiff installing home satellite for a living.

#34 OFFLINE   Newshawk

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Posted 10 July 2012 - 07:58 PM

This may be the ultimate repository of computer service stories!

Computer Stupidities

This is my personal favorite:

I was on duty one night at my university's computing centre. A woman came in with a disk that she wanted to retrieve some files from. The disk was in really bad shape; the metal door was missing, a boot print was on it, and the label had been treated with white-out several times. I suggested she go buy another disk at the vending machine down the hall while I tried to read the data off her disk.

When she returned, I told her that I was able to get most of the information off the old disk. I asked for the new disk so I could save the information.

"Ok," she said, and started to hand the disk to me. Then she paused and said, "Oh, wait. I forgot to format it."

With that, she took the disk in both hands and ripped the metal door off.

"There," she said, pleased with herself.

It took all the self-control I could possibly muster to retain my composure and suggest she buy another disk.


DIRECTV employee April 2004-November 2012.
The above comments are my own because I don't know if anyone would care about my opinions anymore.


#35 OFFLINE   funnyfarm299

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Posted 10 July 2012 - 08:36 PM

One story that I will never forget was when this old granny called up and she needed to be walked over the phone through replacing and installing a new motherboard on her Gateway PC Desktop.Her situation was that her system was out of warranty and that she agreed to pay a discounted rate on having a replacement motherboard sent to her.I really felt bad because whoever she spoke to in sales told her that a tech would come out and install it for her, only to find out 10 days later that she just had the hardware sent to her. What made it worse was that I checked the part sent to her in the ticketing system and found out that it was just a refurbished replacement part.In the end I spent 4 hours over the phone walking her step by step how to remove the bad mother board and then installing the new one.


I'm calling bologna on this story, this was posted to reddit a week or two ago here.

Edited by Mike Bertelson, 11 July 2012 - 10:23 AM.


#36 OFFLINE   spartanstew

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Posted 10 July 2012 - 09:17 PM

Reminds me of a time when we had a company softball tournament.

The head of IT came up and wanted to know why there were "no pepper" signs. I had to explain to him what pepper was. And then in the last inning, the same guy tosses his glove in the air to try and catch a ball over his head, thereby giving the batter a ground rule triple and the man that was on first proceeds to score the winning run. Oh man, can you believe it? Guy had no idea what pepper was or that there was such a thing as a ground rule triple. Still makes me laugh just thinking about that guy.

I'm sure Directv can't wait to get their hands on your unit.

 
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#37 OFFLINE   JBv

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Posted 10 July 2012 - 10:20 PM

My most memorable one: the guy who called complaining that all TV Land and MTV had been showing for the past few days was Michael Jackson stuff and the guide was incorrect.
Michael Jackson had died the day before but that didn't matter because Gunsmoke was being preempted!
And after fielding Viacom complaints all day I'm going to pass out! (Sir I can't give you credit. You receive free services through your condo. Fine I'll credit you for a week without service on a zero dollar bill. That comes out to zero dollars and zero cents. Kthxbye!)
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#38 OFFLINE   billsharpe

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Posted 11 July 2012 - 12:10 PM

My most memorable one: the guy who called complaining that all TV Land and MTV had been showing for the past few days was Michael Jackson stuff and the guide was incorrect.
Michael Jackson had died the day before but that didn't matter because Gunsmoke was being preempted!
And after fielding Viacom complaints all day I'm going to pass out! (Sir I can't give you credit. You receive free services through your condo. Fine I'll credit you for a week without service on a zero dollar bill. That comes out to zero dollars and zero cents. Kthxbye!)


There's really no cause for complaint here, although personally I'd much rather watch Gunsmoke than Michael Jackson. :)
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#39 OFFLINE   maartena

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Posted 11 July 2012 - 05:26 PM

Best call I ever got (or actually worst, I felt for the guy).... and honestly, if you don't really know a whole lot about computers this is understandable.

Friend calls up and says: My hard drive has crashed. But I have a backup on the D: drive but I don't know how to get to it. I made a backup every week of all my work!

After some troubleshooting over the phone and him getting "Operating System Not Found" messages on the screen, I ask him if he could bring over his PC the next day, and I would go take a look at it.

He shows up next day, I hook it all up, and sure.... the disk inside the computer is making an all too familiar grinding/clicking sound, indicating the disk has physically crashed and is beyond any sort of software-type recovery.

No problem, I figure.... he said he had a D: drive. I will take out that drive, hook it up to my system and rescue his precious data. I open up the box, and low and behold: There is 1 physical hard drive in the system.

And now it is starting to sink in.... Upon questioning further how he had setup this D: drive, he said it was already there. And sure enough, after calling the builder (a local grey clone maker), it turns out that they had installed a 160 Gb hard drive in this particular system, which was HUGE at the time, but due to a 128 Gb limitation for the boot partition that existed in XP at the time (SP1) the drive was partitioned into a 100, and a 60 Gb section, and they had send out many hundreds of these systems configured like this.

I could see him sink into his shoes when I explained the concept of partitioning to him, and that there was only 1 drive in the system that was completely toasted.
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#40 OFFLINE   The Walrus

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Posted 11 July 2012 - 05:43 PM

here is my favorite.

mr customer; "yeah, i got a message on my tv that says, no need to call, technical issue and we are currently working to resolve."




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