"Don't touch my junk!"

Discussion in 'The OT' started by Chris Blount, Nov 15, 2010.

  1. Nov 15, 2010 #21 of 282

    SayWhat? Know Nothing

    Jun 6, 2009
    From what I saw of the guy ..... ?????
  2. Nov 16, 2010 #22 of 282

    markfp Legend

    Mar 9, 2010
    A couple of months ago my wife and I were returning from a Canadian vacation and went through a body scanner in Toronto. The scan is "read" at a different location so they don't actually see the person being scanned and the agent at the security checkpoint only sees an outline without details. It's no big deal and a lot less intrusive than a pat down.

    As far as I'm concerned, if it helps keep crazies with explosives in their jock off the plane it's fine with me.
  3. Nov 16, 2010 #23 of 282
    Phil T

    Phil T Well-Known Member DBSTalk Club

    Mar 25, 2002
    Been to a NFL game lately? You get the same pat down but they don't have scanners.
  4. Nov 16, 2010 #24 of 282
    James Long

    James Long Ready for Uplink! Staff Member Super Moderator

    Apr 17, 2003
    There should be more education in advance. I plan on flying early next year on a domestic flight (and return) but do not know what security I will have to go through. I really don't want to be fondled, regardless of the sex or sexual preference of the screener. It isn't something I want my wife to be subjected to either. It is one reason why I have not flown (other than in a private plane) in many years.

    I agree that saying "don't touch me there" isn't going to go over well. But then I watch cable news. I've seen the worst case scenarios on TV. When I go, I'll assume it will be as bad as I've seen and hope for the best.

    A $10,000 fine for bailing out seems excessive. Not being allowed to fly and perhaps being put on a no-fly list for next time seems enough. Does a $10,000 punishment really fit the crime? Is desiring to not be fondled or appear naked in front of a camera now a crime? Apparently it is if you want to fly.

    And is even asking these questions in public going to end up having the TSA, NSA or other three letter agency investigating what I have to hide ... even if all I want to hide is my "junk"?

    BTW: Are people allowed to fly wearing Depends?
  5. Nov 16, 2010 #25 of 282

    SayWhat? Know Nothing

    Jun 6, 2009
    Or what about 'the suit'?


    But, the I guess you wouldn't need the plane, would you? :rolleyes:
  6. Nov 16, 2010 #26 of 282
    Stewart Vernon

    Stewart Vernon Roving Reporter Staff Member Super Moderator DBSTalk Club

    Jan 7, 2005
    Kittrell, NC
    I've asked this myself...

    Years ago, when I was flying... it was all domestic... BUT there was a distinct difference in security from one airport to another.

    I noted regularly that my outbound flight from home on Monday had less security than my outbound flight from the end-destination on Friday..


    Monday -> so-so-security, which meant the airport I had my layover at I got a "free pass" into their secured area without having been screened very much.

    Friday -> Same airport I landed in on Monday screened me much better before leaving so the layover I had on the way home I had already been screened more.

    I even asked the airport security about it... not in a balking way, but explaining to them as I have here, how I noted making the same round trip week after week that I was subjected to much more stringent security scans on the way home than I was on the way out. They really didn't have a good answer for me though.
  7. Nov 16, 2010 #27 of 282

    matt New Member

    Jan 11, 2010
    Funny story about the differences between airport securities. A couple years ago I went to San Francisco. Of course, my little pistol went with me for the nights at the *wonderful* motel I was staying at. Post 9/11.

    I did my homework and had my little locking Pelican case with the ammo in its little factory box inside, magazine out, trigger lock. By the book, to the letter. I get to the check in and I tell them I have a firearm in my checked baggage to declare. Without so much as a second thought, I signed something, the sticker went on my luggage, and off it went, and I go get a snack.

    Time to go home. I get to the airport there, and right counter level in the lane I am at is a sign about declaring a firearm. I point to it, and make my declaration.

    :eek: :eek2: :eek:

    The lady flips out! Like about to piss her pants flipping out. "I can't do this! Someone else is going to have to do this! You are going to have to do this!"

    She motions for the lady next to her to come over, and she takes off. The next lady instructs me to put my suitcase on the counter and open it. I set it up there, open it, and there is my case and dirty underwear for all to see.

    She tells me to open the case. After confirming with her that I am going to open it, I unlock the case, open the lid, and present my plastic fantastic. It's a Keltec P32 for those interested, which now you probably are not. :grin:

    She says "whares dee boolits, whares dee boolits?" "Here in this box." "Ok."

    She walks off. :D So there I am, standing in the middle of a busy airport, with a gun. Sure, its locked, but I could have very easily had it back together in a matter of seconds. The interesting part would have been if other people had glanced over to my luggage, not the fact that I had it. Anyone could walk in with a loaded one just as easy... but if someone saw that thing it probably would have shut down the airport.

    Someone else came after a couple minutes, had me close everything, took my bag, and escorted me to a private area. He then took my keys, looked at my gun, fondled my dirty underwear, and gave me my keys back.

    I saw that lady again. She sheepishly approached me with her tail between her legs, handed me my paperwork, called me "Mr. Firearm", and was gone before I could even blink. :lol:


    Strange how it varies between airports. They would probably let me check out their gun in the Tulsa airport. :lol:

    Another interesting tidbit. This was probably a year ago. I went up to NY to visit my sister. Somewhere along the flight, there was a stop, and just about everyone got off but me for some reason. I then moved to the front to the bulkhead :)D) and chatted up the female flight attendants :)D).

    Anyway, this dude walks up with a tie and some wings. I ask him if he is our pilot. He is, we chatted for a minute, talked about whatever, and before I knew it, I was sitting in the driver seat and he was showing me the instrumentation. :glasses:

    I didn't get to drive of course, but it was cool and very interesting that I made it in there, much less got to sit in the seat!
  8. Nov 16, 2010 #28 of 282

    MysteryMan Well-Known Member DBSTalk Club

    May 17, 2010
    Assigning a seat in the "electric chair" would make it harder on those who would do us harm.
  9. Nov 16, 2010 #29 of 282

    Herdfan Well-Known Member

    Mar 18, 2006
    Not yet this year, but really?

    I have been to a couple of NASCAR races and while they have a "security" table that checks your bags, they are not thorough and you could easily carry in just about anything you wish.

    And yes NASCAR is not the NFL, there are usually twice as many people in a track than at a stadium.
  10. Nov 16, 2010 #30 of 282

    RasputinAXP Kwisatz Haderach of Cordcuttery

    Jan 23, 2008
    I've seen a couple of reports that these scanners wouldn't have caught the underwear bomber guy.

    All I know is I'm pretty sure I'm taking a train or driving with my family from now on. My 3 year old and 1 year old don't need scans or gropings.
  11. Nov 16, 2010 #31 of 282

    durl Hall Of Fame

    Mar 27, 2003
    El Al knows how to conduct security. They are VERY thorough, but they target potential terrorists rather than trying to be "PC" about security. Random searches, I believe, are totally unnecessary.
  12. Nov 16, 2010 #32 of 282

    djlong Hall Of Fame

    Jul 8, 2002
    New Hampshire
    These scanners would not have caught the Xmas Underwear bomber.

    Remember Richard Reid? In the 8+ years since the Shoe Bomber, what security procedure caught the would-be terrorist? The neighboring passengers and the flight crew. AGAIN. The billions spent on security at the airports did NOTHING.

    How many people have been caught? You know VERY well that, if the TSA caught someone with explosives, that person's mug shot would be on TSA PSAs every hour on the hour for the next year to justify their existence.

    Went through security at PHL last year. At the gate, they searched everyone again. I wondered - was this an admission of the ineffectiveness of the 'regular' checkpoint or more Security Theater?

    When there is an unpopular law in a given municipality or state, you can put a referendum on the ballot to get it overturned. Exactly who does the TSA and DHS (Dept. of Homeland Security) answer to in that way? Where is the referendum for nationwide issues?

    My daughter flies frequently and is OUTRAGED at all this - largely because of the expense (added taxes on your tickets) and ineffectiveness. Now she believes the most dangerous part of flying will be the airport because THAT is where the terrorist can self-detonate for maximum casualties. Tomorrow she's on a plane to Central America and it'll be more Security Theater for her.

    Take the train? I'd love to. In fact my daughter is doing exactly that the day after Thanksgiving - but I still have to drive an hour to the train station in Boston to pick her up. Oh, but we CAN'T have more trains because they don't turn a profit (and highways do? The gas tax doesn't pay for them, they're subsidized from general revenues) and wires are unsightly and diesel locomotives are noisy and people die when they go around the lowered crossing gates... Give me a bleeping break. The airlines need bailouts and the Air Traffic Control system is entirely taxpayer funded. But somehow Amtrak is treated like a red-headed stepchild.

    I was in Europe in September. The trains went EVERYWHERE, they came frequently and were fast and efficient. When Iceland's volcano blew it's top, there was chaos when all those flights were cancelled but the continent pressed extra trains into service. If something like that happened here (like when the airspace was closed for 3 days after 9/11) we don't have the trains or the tracks to press into service.

    Sorry for the rant... I'll calm down now...
  13. Nov 16, 2010 #33 of 282

    Hoosier205 Active Member

    Sep 3, 2007
    :rolleyes: Please do. If you want to fly, follow the rules.
  14. Nov 16, 2010 #34 of 282

    fluffybear Hall Of Fame

    Jun 19, 2004
    My thoughts exactly!

    There are plenty of rules in society which we may not like but we are still obligated to follow them and if this is what it takes to board an airplane then I am willing to do it.
  15. Nov 16, 2010 #35 of 282

    SayWhat? Know Nothing

    Jun 6, 2009
    ^^ I propose people stop flying until the rules are changed. Who does the TSA answer to? Let hundreds of planes sit on the ground for a few days due to a passenger boycott and find out.
  16. Nov 16, 2010 #36 of 282
    Chris Blount

    Chris Blount Creator of DBSTalk Staff Member Administrator DBSTalk Gold Club

    Jun 22, 2001
    Here is most of the recording. I will be flying soon and quite frankly I really don't know what I'm going to do. I don't want the body scanner yet I don't want the pat down either. It's going to be an interesting day at the airport. :)

    I'm tempted to write "FU TSA" on my t-shirt is some sort of x-ray resistant material. I'm suprised nobody has tried that yet.

    I think the TSA has become a monster and should be disbanded. I'm also suprised that some aiports haven't opted out of having TSA in their airports especially with all the controversy.

  17. Nov 16, 2010 #37 of 282

    BubblePuppy Good night dear Smoke... love you & "got your butt

    Nov 3, 2006
    How about "I'll let you touch my junk if you let me kick yours.".
  18. Nov 16, 2010 #38 of 282

    SayWhat? Know Nothing

    Jun 6, 2009
    ^^ You mean like Lindsay Lohan had on her fingernail in court (without the TSA part) ?
  19. Nov 16, 2010 #39 of 282

    SayWhat? Know Nothing

    Jun 6, 2009
    What else could TSA do?

    How many dogs could they have trained to sniff nitrates with all that money? Most people I know would rather have a dog sniff them and their junk than any of the other options so far.
  20. Nov 16, 2010 #40 of 282

    ProfLonghair Hall Of Fame

    Sep 26, 2006
    That would only be applicable if the guy was flying TSA air. The TSA doesn't own the plane, or the airport, for that matter.

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