I received my box on Tuesday and plugged it in. I turned off 2 HR25s to keep me under my SWM8 but already had an order for SWM16 upgrade in for yesterday.
I called and activated the box with no problem on Tuesday (it was a "normal" CSR and he also said to keep an eye out for RVU tvs coming out - so I told him they were out already :lol
I had my SWM upgrade yesterday with no issues.
For your needs there is no different between adding a couple of HRDVRs and an HR34 - if the number of tuners > 8 you need SWM16 upgrade ($49.99)
My tech did notice one thing, which may also be your problem. First he wasnt notified it was going to be a SWM16 upgrade - the system didnt add it. And we found out why - although I activated it on my account and could see the HR34 online, it was not in their backend system and did not show up on his handheld. Which is why it would not trigger the SWM16 automatically.
Call them back and get them to check that it is on your account and activate it. Then you can get the SWM16